How to Make Friends in the Netherlands
- 19 feb
- 2 minuten om te lezen
(Without Small Talk)
Making friends in the Netherlands can be tricky — especially if you’re not into small talk. Discover how expats build real connections, plus the best clubs, meetups, and online communities to meet new people.
11. Why it feels hard to connect at first
Many expats say the same thing: Dutch people are friendly, but not immediately open. Small talk isn’t part of Dutch culture — conversations tend to be more practical and direct. That can feel distant at first, but it’s actually a sign of honesty rather than disinterest.
Good to know: once you’ve made a Dutch friend, you usually have a loyal one for life.
2. Go where people share your interests
You’ll connect faster by doing something rather than just talking. Shared activities help bypass small talk and build real bonds. Try these options:
🏃♂️ Join a local running or sports club:
Parkrun Netherlands – free weekly 5k runs across the country.
Meetup Running Groups – international-friendly clubs in major cities.
Strava – find local running or cycling groups.
☕ Coworking and expat meetups:
IamExpat – is a good site where many expat events are also listed and published.
Meetup.com – search for Expats in Amsterdam, Rotterdam Expats, or Digital Nomads Netherlands.
Internations.org – global expat network with professional and social events.
WorkinNL – for international professionals looking to expand their network.
🎨 Join creative or language communities:
Eventbrite.nl – look for English-language events, workshops, and classes.
Language Exchange Amsterdam – great for meeting locals and improving Dutch in a casual setting.
Serve the city – volunteer work is one of the fastest ways to meet open-minded locals.
3. Skip small talk — go for real conversations
In Dutch culture, authenticity beats politeness. Instead of superficial chit-chat (“How’s the weather?”), ask real questions or share personal opinions. For example:
“What’s the best part about living in this neighborhood?”
“How did you end up in the Netherlands?”
“What do you usually do on weekends?”
It shows genuine interest and builds connection faster.
4. Be consistent
Dutch social circles can take time to open — but consistency matters. Show up regularly at the same club, café, or meetup, and you’ll soon move from “acquaintance” to “friend.”
Tip: Most expats report it takes about 6–12 months to feel socially settled — so be patient and keep showing up.
5. Bonus: online communities worth joining
If you’re just getting started, join these expat networks to stay in the loop:
Amsterdam Mamas – for parents and families
Girl Gone International – Netherlands – for women building friendships abroad
Moving to the Netherlands doesn’t mean starting from zero. Focus on shared interests, show up consistently, and skip the small talk — that’s how friendships really begin here.
👉 Looking for more tips on expat life in the Netherlands? Read our guide on Dutch work culture or
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